A Goldmine to Your Ex’s Attorney: Sexual Pictures on Social Media
In the previous i discussed post pictures of children and the effects posting certain types of pictures and videos on social media could have on a family law case. In this article the focus is on “sexy selfies” or photos of yourself which may be viewed unfavorably by the court.
Again the three questions to ask yourself in deciding whether to post a picture of your child also apply in determining whether you should post a picture of yourself.
1. Would you want to hide it from the judge?
2. Would you have to explain anything to the judge so it doesn’t make you look bad?
3. If your ex posted it, would you be able to make him/her look bad with it?
Another way to think about it is this: If you would not want any of the following to see it, DO NOT POST IT!
- priest or pastor
- child’s teacher
Below is a sample list of photos you should never post of yourself, and should remove if already posted, especially if you are involved in some type of family law dispute.
1. Sexually Suggestive Poses
During a family law dispute, people who were once very close and comfortable enough to share everything in an instant can become each other’s worst enemy. Pictures your former spouse or partner may have requested you take, can be turned around on you. For example, your ex may have encouraged you to post pictures of yourself in sexually suggestive poses, “so everyone can see how sexy you are.” However, once the couple becomes involved in a custody dispute, the pictures once requested, will become the picture he can’t believe you took and posted on Facebook. If you have posted pictures like this while in a relationship with someone you are now going through a legal dispute with, or are likely to go through a dispute with, remove the pictures.
2. Naked Pictures – Even if Nothing is Showing
In our society there are various degrees of acceptability when it comes to the human body. Society’s view of the naked form not only varies from country to country, but from region to region. Some people may view a photograph of a naked woman or man as art, but another will only view it as pornographic. As people’s perceptions vary, so do judge’s. For example, a wife is pregnant and has artistic photos taken of herself where her private areas are concealed, and then posts them on social media. Although the wife sees the photos as a beautiful artistic expression of the female form, a judge may not share her same enthusiasm. Respect your own privacy and keep these types of photos off of social media.
3. Body Piercings
Pictures of piercings of anything other than on your face should not be on social media. Pictures of breast, vaginal, or of male piercings should not be shared. On your phone, the picture may seem flattering and cool, but when the picture is blown up on the projector in the middle of the courtroom in front of your ex, the judge, the court reporter, and bailiff, it will not seem so flattering and cool. In a family law proceeding your perception of you is not as important as the judge’s perception of you. Leave the self-expression for those who know you best, and those who meet you in person, keep it off of social media.
4. Tattoos in Areas Normally Covered by Clothing
Pictures of tattoos are generally okay as long as they are not vulgar in nature, and in a place normally visual in public. For example, a tattoo on your arm or lower leg, of a flower or cross, is fine. However, a tattoo on your upper thigh, breasts, stomach, side, or lower back are most likely not okay. Remember, regardless of your personal opinion on tattoos, or even society’s general acceptance of tattoos, it is the judge’s opinion and perception that is the most important. I am not suggesting you should not have these tattoos, just do not post pictures of them on social media when you are involved in a family law dispute.
5. Pictures or Videos of Dancing – Especially Pole Dancing
Pictures or videos of you and your friends living it up at the club, or dancing in any sexually suggestive manner should not be shared on social media. Although the dancing may be innocent, or just of you having a good time, an attorney can paint the pictures or video in an unfavorable light, suggesting you are uncontrollable, reckless, or have a drinking problem. Even certain types of fitness dance, especially pole dancing, can be construed in an unfavorable light. The majority of people are only familiar with pole dancing as “what strippers do,” even though it has become popular in mainstream society as a new fitness workout. The shared post of your new routine you have been working on with your instructor may be a moment you are very proud of, but in the eyes of judges it may only be seen as inappropriate.
If you are facing a family law issue, please call me, Attorney Jamie Anderson, to set-up your free in-office or telephone consultation at (937)879-9542.